On any given day, someone asks me for help with their anxiety. I always find it interesting when someone “owns” their problem and I don’t mean in a “I am taking responsibility for my problem” way, but in a “this is MY lollipop and you can’t have ANY of it.” kind of way.
I hear statements like “My anxiety keeps me up at night” or “My anxiety stops me from going out and looking for a new job” or “My anxiety won’t let me …..’ you get the idea.
When I first started seeing clients I was amazed at how prevalent anxiety was in our society. Almost everyone I know was suffering in some way and I often asked myself is this a new pandemic that no one is really talking about?
It seemed to be more common than the flu. So as I went about helping clients get grounded and centred, set and reach goals or heal past trauma. I noticed that their anxiety had mostly gone, even when we hadn’t been working on anxiety at all. I realised early on that what people needed most was to ground back into the present moment because when we are grounded everything comes back into alignment.
That lead me to wondering then… Why do some clients never let go of their anxiety and others seem able to move on after 1 or 2 sessions? In my experience it had nothing to do with the severity of anxiety, or how long they had been experiencing it, but I did notice that the language a client used to describe “their anxiety” was very revealing.
So I started paying closer attention to their language, especially the words they used to describe their feelings and experiences. I noticed when someone took ownership of their anxiety like it belonged to them, that it did actually belong to them and it was much harder to release.
I have also noticed that Clients who are willing to release their language patterns around a particular illness often heal much quicker than those who don’t. Which comes back to the universal principle that what we think about, we bring about, as energy follows thought.
So here it is in practice….
Last week I had a sore throat. (I needed to get something off my chest! Hahaha) and I don’t think I once called it ‘My sore throat.” (You can correct me if I’m wrong!) I know I whinged “I have a sore throat” and “Oh dear my throat is sore”, (especially to my poor husband) but I didn’t own it. The sore throat lasted 2 days. I spoke my truth and it was gone.
“I have a headache” a heard myself say a few days later. That too passed quickly.
“My back is killing me“…. Oh here we go….
“My back pain” has been “playing up” for the past few months. I have been having all sorts of treatment but it hasn’t really been shifting for any length of time.
I first injured my back when I was 11. Prior to that I suffered with knee pain almost daily since I was a baby. I barely remember a time without pain in my life. Pain language was something that was just normal for me. I owned the pains. They were mine. I developed this language a really long time ago and by gosh I was sticking to it. (My ego self pokes her tongue out!) So knowing that herein lie the problem, I started tuning in to a few more of my
aches and pains. I took note of the language I was using in my head when I experienced pain and the stories I was telling myself.
Now, I have done a lot of self-healing over the years. If there were a degree course in self-help and weird healing rituals I would have a doctorate. In pursuit of my own truth (and the continuing journey of refining my truth) I have learnt a thing or two about how my mind thinks. Yet still some days it manages to surprise me with an old trick like “My back pain”.
I know better than to use this language with myself.
I teach it everyday.
I practice it everyday.
So why did I still need it when I was experiencing physical pain? Was it for comfort?
Am I holding onto the pain like an old friend, someone who will walk with me
everyday of my life?
My answer was most definitely “YES”. I was still taking ownership. That awareness brought magical relief – Because now that I am aware, I can release it.
I felt like shouting from the roof tops. Hallelujah!
Not only is my back feeling much better, my mind feels clearer, more focused andcentred. I released an old pattern.
It is fantastic!
I experienced what it is like to feel free.
Woohoo!
Go try it for yourself!
